Not Right
Saturday, Dec. 22, 2007..8:11 p.m.
i'm losing it. Seriously. I looked forward all day to talking to someone and as soon as I do I piss him off and he leaves,

I don't blame him, raally. I just can't handle a lot right now. There's too many unfulfilled expectations and too much upheaval for me to really be in any condition to do much. I'm so tired and I can't sleep and I feel like I'm begging someone to tell me it'll all be ok. It's one of those times when I doubt it'll all be ok. How can it be??

I'm being a bitch to the person I love and I can't stand it. I keep crying and I don't know why. I'm so scared.

I can't shake the things I'm feeling right now. I can't shake the overwhelming fear, I can't shake the sense of forboding that all but overpowers me. I don't know what's wrong.

All I do know is that I can't keep going like this for much longer. I'm going to completely crack and drive everyone away, of course if I drive everyone away my fears and the forboding will have made themselves founded. I don't whant that to happen.

What is wrong with me??

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